This made me think hard. I'm the kind of person who has a high tolerance on whatever happens to me or around me, even if it isn't really okay with me. My mantra: "I don't give a god-damn care!" It's always ready to come out of my mouth. And everyday, it seems this mantra has become more comfortably dominating my life. I shrug anything off, almost always. I have no time to overthink. I choose not to use my energy for other things I do not have control over.
But right now, I'm sort of starting to doubt my choices. I think I deserve more.
"The most satisfied people don't wait for what they want to happen. They go get it."
Lately, I begin hearing myself say "I know what I want." I like control. I take charge.
That's a good sign, I guess, that I'm taking charge of my life. Not dependent on fate, circumstances nor other people. I refuse to be at the mercy of others and to let things happen "que sera sera."
No. "Whatever will be, will be" is unacceptable. It's not okay, because I know what I want, and i'll get what I want. No more, no less.
This song I made today introduces me to a new person in me. Say hello to the NEW ME. Hahaha.
IT'S NOT OKAY
Don't.
Don't treat me like I am less.
When I rise up,
I am more than what you think I am.
Don't push me to the edge.
When I feel it's done,
I am done and it's all over.
There is no turning back.
Don't.
Don't treat me like I don't know.
I know what I want.
I'll get what I want.
Don't drive my heart and mind.
You have no control over me.
I take no chances.
When it's not okay, it's not okay.
It's not okay to be at your mercy
I won't beg for what I truly deserve.
Either you give me or not at all.
Either you please me or not at all.
There are no gray areas now.
No more waiting now.
If you can't, if you won't
I'll walk away coz it's not okay.
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